Because I loved her
by kissmekent
Summary: In the new star trek movie we get introduced to the relationship between Spock and Uhura. In this story follows their relationship from the beginning...
1. Come Away With Me

**Because I Loved Her**

**Chapter 1: Come Away With Me**

Spock couldn't believe that he was back in these hallowed halls, but this time, he was the teacher. He had spent the last semester teaching eager young cadets. All were eager, but some were more promising than others. One in particular was Cadet Uhura. He had graded the midterms the students had studied diligently for. He could tell that they all prepared for the test and did their very best, but Uhura was the only one to receive a perfect grade.

Spock passed back all test but hers, in an effort to speak with her about her promising future. After he dismissed the students, she approached him. "Mr. Spock, did you finish grading my test?"

"I did, and I wanted to be the one to tell you myself, you received a perfect score on your midterm."

"I did?" She was shocked, "Oh, my."

"I have been very impressed in your performance so far this semester. Have you chosen a major?"

"I have been told that I have a way with languages, I would love to be an interpreter."

"It is good to hear that. What languages have you learned so far?"

"The most common human languages, English, French, Spanish, and Vulcan; I'd love to learn Romulan but as a second year there wasn't room in the class for me."

"I am fluent in all three dialects of Romulan, if you are willing to learn."

The way her face lit up gave him an emotion he wasn't familiar with. Pleasure. Being half human he was capable of feeling emotions that Vulcans could not. However, he had always spent a great deal of effort to suppress these emotions. "I would love that!" Uhura said.

"Very well, Cadet, why don't you come to my office this afternoon after your last class and we'll get started."

And so it went. On Tuesdays and Thursday after classes Cadet Uhura would spend two hours learning the intricacies of the Romulan language. A month into their tutoring sessions Uhura was almost as fluent as he was, _"What do you do when you're not teaching or on a Starship?"_ Uhura asked him in Romulan.

"_I meditate. I write my parents a letter every week."_

"_Tell me about them."_

"_My father is Sarek, a wise leader on Vulcan, and my mother is named Amanda Grayson, she's human."_

"_I thought your eyes looked different than other Vulcans."_

"_Yes, it was something that I was teased about as a child." _Helooked up and their eyes met. _"Being a child of two worlds is never easy."_

Switching back to English, Uhura smiled, "You need a little more fun in your life."

"What is logical about fun?"

"Nothing, that's what so great about it." Her smile expanded, "I have an idea, I heard that a great Jazz band is playing in a club a few blocks from here. Would you care to join me?"

"It would be inappropriate for you and I to spend time together in that manner." Deep down he regretted that he could not go, for he knew it would make her happy.

Uhura sighed, "I'm not asking you out on a date. I'm just suggesting we go to the same location and listen to some good music. While in Rome…"

"What does that mean?"

"It's a saying, When in Rome, do in the Romans do. In other words, you're on earth among humans, you might as well experience more of our culture than the Starfleet headquarters and the Academy."

He wanted to learn more about Uhura, to spend time with her. Despite his Vulcan logic screaming as him to decline, he replied, "Than I shall accept your invitation."

The dark Jazz room was the perfect place to get away in anonymity. Spock was surprised by how much he was enjoying the outing with his student. But he couldn't help but wish that she wasn't. That she was just another woman and he a man. The more he got to know this amazing woman the more he wanted to. They were sitting in a booth in the back to avoid anyone they knew from seeing them.

_Come away with me in the night_

_Come away with me_

_And I will write you a song_

"I love this song," Uhura whispered. Spock could feel the emotions of the words almost overcome him.

_Come away with me on a bus_

_Come away with me where they can't tempt us_

_With their lies_

He leaned close, whispering so as not to be heard. "I can understand what drives humans to seek solace in the arts." Their eyes locked as the romance of the music flowed over them.

_I want to walk with you_

_On a cloudy day_

_In fields where the yellow grass grows knee high_

_Won't you try to come_

"I've wanted to kiss your seriousness away for a while now." She whispered. Their faces were close together lips within inches of each other.

_Come away with me and we'll kiss_

_On a mountain top _

_Come away with me_

_And I will never stop loving you_

At the word kiss, Spock gave in to what he had been holding back, and kissed Uhura with more passion than he knew he had.

_I want to wake up with the rain_

_Falling on a tin roof_

_While I'm safe there in your arms_

_All I ask of you is to come_

"We shouldn't be doing this." Spock whispered as he broke off the kiss in heavy breathing.

"Why?"

_Come away with me and we'll kiss_

_On a mountain top_

_Come away with me_

_And I'll never stop loving you_

"I'm you're teacher, and an officer, and you're a Cadet. If anyone found out this could ruin your career before it even began."

"I want this. I can separate my social life from my academic life if you can."

_Come away with me_

_Come away with me_

_Come away with me_

TBC…

A/N: This story is based on the new Star Trek movie. I plan on continuing through to the end of the movie and beyond focusing on Spock and Uhura's relationship. The song is 'Come Away With Me' by Nora Jones (others have also sung it.) hope you enjoyed it and I'm already thinking about the next chapter! I welcome comments.


	2. Illogical Females

**Because I Loved Her**

**Chapter 2: Illogical Females  
**

Spock and Nyota continued to see each other. In the presence of others they were the model Student and Teacher, but they found constant excuses to slip away and enjoy the presence of each other. Nyota introduced him to different aspects of earth's culture that he found fascinating in how they were often both complex and simple. But now, the summer was looming. Spock had agreed to teach for two years at the Starfleet Academy, and was planning to teach courses over the summer. The fact that Nyota decided to stay along with other over achievers did not throw any red flags to those in power in Starfleet.

The summer went by fast, and before they knew it the student body had returned in full force. The day before classes were to resume, Nyota Uhura was called to visit her academic advisor to discuss her future in Star Fleet.

Nyota was so nervous. She had always received superior marks from all of her professors, but she knew that with so many good students, good marks were not always enough. "Enter." A strong female voice answered when she knocked, "Oh, good, Cadet Uhura. Sit, I was just finishing up here. How are you feeling about starting the new semester?"

"Good," Uhura said, "I'm looking forward to finally being able to put my skills to good use."

"Well, you just may do so earlier than you dreamed of. Starfleet will complete a new flag ship the NCC-1701, also known as the Enterprise along with other NCC class ships. I am recommending you for the position of communications officer."

"But I'm only a third year." Uhura protested.

"And more fluent in Romulan and Vulcan than most veteran officers, thanks to your work with Commander Spock. You have taken enough classes that you will graduate by the end of this year. You, Cadet Uhura are the pivotal of what it is to be a member of Starfleet. Don't hold yourself back by doubting yourself."

When she mentioned her tutoring sessions with Spock she almost flinched. She had been sleeping with Spock for the last six months and cared about him deeply, and while she knew that he cared for her likewise, he had yet to say the words, and she wondered if he ever would. Despite his human half, he was too good at suppressing his emotions for his own good. "Thank you, Professor, you have no idea how much your confidence means to me."

An hour later, Uhura raced to meet Spock at the out of the way diner they had come to think of as 'their place,' as it was rare for anyone from Starfleet to acknowledge its existence. "What did your advisor have to say?" Spock asked when she joined him.

"that with all my classes and our tutoring sessions, I'll be serving aboard one of the new NCC class ships by the end of the year, possibly the flagship, the Enterprise."

"You do not look pleased. Is it not logical that you would be happy about your fortunate outcome to your hard work?"

"I can't help but think that if we hadn't…"

"I did not treat you any differently when it came to academics, than any other student. I know how important it is to you to earn your own way in this world. I would not deny you that satisfaction you so require in your success."

Uhura sighed, "Thank you. Have you heard anything about your assignment after your teaching time is up at the end of the year?"

"Captain Pike has been granted the Enterprise to command, and has asked me to be his first officer."

"That's great." Uhura said, "Maybe we'll both be on Enterprise."

"As hard as it's been to conceal our relationship now in San Francisco, it will be nearly impossible on a starship." Spock said. "My recommendations will determine who gets assigned were, and I fear that if I recommend you for the Enterprise, and they find about us, they will think I did so for personal reasons."

"And if anyone were to say such a thing, I'll give them a piece of my mind."

"You humans are far too impulsive for your own good."

"Yes, it's our pesky emotions coming out again. But don't forget, you have that potential too… has your mother ever snapped at your father in a moment of passion… or hormones."

"If she ever did, it was never in my presence." Spock's expression was serious and introspective.

"Spock, it was a joke. You take everything so seriously. Vulcan women may be rational, but we earth women are known for being irrational. Especially when our hormones get involved."

"Yes, I recall during you last monthly you called me a…"

"Let's not revisit that." She smiled, "Let's make a pack that no matter what happens, we'll always be there for each other."

"After all this time it would be only logical to think about the next step in our relationship." Spock said, "I must warn you that I am uncertain."

Nyota snorted, "You think I am certain? I know that I care about you, and I enjoy my time with you."

"As do I," Spock said. Uhura saw the edge of his mouth twitch. She knew that Vulcans prized themselves on suppressing their emotions, so that much of an expression meant a lot.

TBC…

A/N: Hope you enjoyed this. Spock's speech pattern is particularly difficult to write. I look forward to reading your reviews. Thanks!


	3. Meeting the Parent

**Because I Loved Her**

**Chapter 3: Meeting the Parent  
**

Spock was shocked; his mother had showed up a month before the first semester was supposed to end. His father was on a mission to help with first contact for the next month and Amanda Grayson took the opportunity to visit her only son, who she had not seen in person in over a year. "Mother, I was not expecting you." Spock said.

"Your father had a last minute mission, and I could either stay on Vulcan alone, or take the opportunity to visit you. What is the class I saw you come out of?"

"I am teaching Xenolinguistics. Communication officers must be able to communicate in many languages. I am teaching Romulan this semester, and next spring I'll give an introduction to Klingon."

His mother smiled, "Your students probably either love or hate you."

Only Spock's great emotional control kept his face from revealing his shock at the word 'love.' "Would you care to join me for the evening meal?"

"I would love that."

Thirty minutes later the mother and son were sitting down in the dining hall with their dinner. Nyota Uhura walked close to them in the dining hall. Spock saw her over his mother's shoulder. Their eyes locked. "Cadet." Spock spoke formally, "This is my mother, Amanda Grayson. Mother, this is one of my best students, Cadet Nyota Uhura."

Nyota looked a little shocked that Spock had introduced her to his mother. "Good to meet you."

"Please," Amanda said, "Sit down, eat with us. I would like to get to know one of my son's students. What's your focus?"

"Xenolingustics, With your son's help I am almost fluent in Vulcan, Romulan, and we're working on Klingon."

"You're going to be very valuable to the federation. They need all the linguists they can get. I myself was studying the Vulcan language when I met Sarek. Spock's father. What are your plans?"

"My advisor says I'll be ready to graduate at the end of next semester, and then I have a good shot to be serving aboard one of the new NCC class ships, even the Enterprise, the new flag ship."

"How long have you known my son?"

"Since he arrived here last year."

"And how long have you been seeing my son." At the last question Spock and Nyota's eyes met in a flash.

"Mother, it would be illogical and improper for me to be romantically involved in a student."

Amanda eyed the two of them, "Of course it is." She realized that although Vulcans rarely lied, if they did feel the way she had read the two of them, they probably were not ready to admit it to themselves. "Excuse me. Cadet Uhura, where are you from?"

Later that evening, Spock was walking his mother to the hotel that she was staying at for the weeks that she was here. She had told him that she was planning on visiting some old friends while Sarek was gone, and when he returned they'd spend a weekend here together before returning to Vulcan.

She sighed, as they went inside her hotel room, "I know what I saw in both of your eyes, Spock. Not many humans can read your eyes, but I am your mother, I know what I saw. If you're not ready for people to know about your relationship with Nyota Uhura, I won't say anything, but please don't lie to me."

Spock sighed, "I never meant to lie to you, I apologize. Yes, Nyota and I have been seeing each other for a year now. We plan on telling people when she graduates. We feared that if it came out that we had a relationship now it would affect both of our careers."

"And what else did you fear?" Amanda eyed him, "Spock, if you fear retribution from your father, don't. He would not object to your relationship with a human woman. You are half human after all."

"Not so much father, but the rest of Vulcan. I try and suppress these disconcerting feelings, but if Vulcans will barely accept me, a human-Vulcan hybrid, they will never accept me with a human mate."

"My son, you chose to join Starfleet instead of the Vulcan science academy. Perhaps that meant that you wanted to be here, among humans. Don't fear so much about what other people think. Just make choices that will make you happy." She smiled, and stroked his cheek the way that she had done when he was a child. "So tell me about Nyota."

"Well, she is an extremely gifted linguist, she's almost as fluent as I am in Vulcan and Romulan as I am and she's well on her way with the Klingon."

"I was thinking more on the personal side."

"Well, Nyota is beautiful and gentle, but at the same time she is strong and is more than capable of taking care of herself."

"What are your plans?"

"Right now we do not have any firm plans. Nyota wants a chance to begin her career, and then we'll see."

Nyota was excited and unsure at the same time. Spock's mother arrived yesterday, and she knew about their relationship. Today Spock's mother had asked to meet her again. So, here she was, meeting her secret boyfriend and his mother at a restaurant in the hotel she was staying at. Just as she reached the door, she ran into Spock, "Oh, thank god!" Uhura said, "I was afraid I'd be alone with my mother."

"She is not that bad."

"I'm sure, it was just a joke."

"You humans like to say the opposite of what you mean." At that moment they arrived at the table, where his mother was waiting. "Good evening mother."

"Good evening Spock, and it's nice to see you again Miss Uhura."

"Nyota, please."

"Nyota, I look forward to hearing all about your relationship with my son."

TBC…

A/N: Hope you liked this. Next we'll learn more about their relationship and move more towards their life on the Enterprise!


	4. Ends and Beginnings

**Because I Loved Her**

**Chapter 4: Ends and Beginnings**

A month after having met her lover's mother Uhura was extremely nervous once again. Spock's Vulcan father was arriving within the next week and while Uhura knew that Spock's mother Amanda Grayson liked her and approved of their relationship, but what of his father? Sarek might be a liberal Vulcan, after all, he married a human, but would he be behind his son's relationship with a human woman. "What do you think your father will say?" Uhura asked. She was naked laying in the motel bed with her darker skin contrasting against his pale skin, with her head laying on his shoulder.

"I do not know. He once told me as a child that he married my mother because it was logical for the ambassador to earth to marry a human. Perhaps he will see the logic in our connection. However he will most definitely have an issue of our other relationship."

"You mean the fact that you are teaching at the Academy and I'm a cadet there?"

"Precisely."

"Do you think it might be better to wait until I graduate. I've only got one semester to go. Perhaps he'll be more receptive to our relationship once I have my officer commission?"

"Perhaps, however I do not like asking mother to keep a secret this big from my father." Spock sighed, and looked down as the beauty at his side, "If you wish to keep this secret until your graduation, we shall."

"I just don't want to put your father in a position to have to lie to members of the federation, unlike your mother, he's in constant contact with high members of Starfleet as an Ambassador."

"Then we shall wait."

And so they did. Spock had explained to his mother their fears, and she agreed to wait and let them tell Sarek until after Uhura was an Officer in Starfleet. Thanks to Spock's logic and control along with both of their professionalism they were able to maintain the façade of being teacher and student, but in truth their relationship grew to much more than that. Uhura believed that she was falling head over heels in love with Spock son of Sarek. However she had yet to say the words.

Perhaps she was waiting for him to say it first. Or maybe she was afraid that she would say those three special words and he would be unable to return the powerful feelings that she felt for him. However those fears were put to rest every time she saw him let his emotional control slip just enough for her to see his feelings peak through.

It was a seemingly ordinary day that changed their entire world. Uhura was in class, during the Kobayashi Maru test, when the unthinkable happened. The computer screens flickered and the scenario went from a no win scenario to an effortless win against the computer generated Klingon. She glared at Cadet Kirk, who was sitting in his 'captain's' chair eating his apple, so cocky and self assured. She looked up in the booth were Spock was glaring at the Cadet who had just beaten his unbeatable test.

Uhura wanted to yell at him, but doing so would make them question why she cared about Kirk's actions. So she went through the motions. That evening she was finally able to get away and meet Spock. "What happened?"

"I am unsure. I do know that Cadet Kirk was somehow able to get into the computer and change the scenario. Tomorrow the council will gather with the entire student body and faculty watching and decide if Kirk deserves to continue with Starfleet or if he will have to find another path in life."

And so it happened, the next day was a blur. She was sure that Kirk was seconds from expulsion when there was word of a broadcast from Vulcan that a natural disaster was imminent and that they may require assistance. At that the entire population emptied out of the auditorium and headed towards their assignment.

But what she heard made her mad. She was at the top of her class, fluent in Vulcan, Romulan, and Klingon, and she was not posted to one of the ships that was to be used for exploration, in a huff she walked straight for her lover. In an attempt to not appear biased, he'd damned overcompensated by making sure she wasn't anywhere near where she deserved, so she made him have it, quoting back his exact evaluation… "Cadet Uhura, Enterprise."

"Thank you." She said, turning to the shuttle that would take them to Enterprise.

Looking back, she thanked all the little things that added to their survival. First the new helmsman forgot one aspect to their undocking their procedures, which delayed their departure by seconds. And then _he _had found his way on board, probably with the help of his friend, the medical officer, she couldn't remember his name, but Kirk kept calling him Bones for some reason. But he recognized the danger that was waiting for them when they reached Vulcan.

But in the end it wasn't enough. After all they did to stop the rogue Romulan from his plot, they were able to release the substance into the planet's core, and she watched and listened in horror as the place where her lover had been born and grew up imploded on itself killing everything that remained on the surface, including the lovely Amanda Grayson, who she had met only once before.

When Spock returned to the bridge she saw what those who did not know him as well as she did could not. When Spock had failed to save his planet and his mother a part of him had died. That was why when he entered the turbo lift she followed, no longer caring who saw or who knew. Her only thoughts were on Spock, the man that she loved. She stopped the lift between floors and kissed him hard hoping that her love for him could save the remaining pieces of his soul, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. What do you need."

She could tell that it took everything in his power to not crumple on the floor and cry in her arms, "I need everyone to continue to perform admirably." So silently, Uhura kissed him again as if to transfer her love to him and sustain him until this was over and she could show him more intimately than time allowed now. And then she watched as him leave the lift into hall.

TBC…

A/N: Hope you're not upset that I fast forwarded so fast, but that scene has been haunting me since seeing the movie, the expression of Spock standing on the transporter platform with his hand reaching out to where his mother was supposed to stand but had disappeared into the depths of the planet. It was so heartbreaking, I couldn't help thinking "she can't die, the planet can't be destroyed, both were used in the original Star Trek show and the movies! That was when I realized that time travel was involved! And don't worry, I am far from over!


	5. Because I Loved Her

**Because I Loved Her**

**Chapter 5: Because I Loved Her  
**

"_We must evacuate, the planet has only seconds." They did not question, they did not argue, but they ran for the entrance where the Enterprise could beam them off the planet. Once out of the cave they froze to allow the transporter techs to get a lock on them. Mere seconds and they'd be safe, but just as they were getting beamed away the rock fell out from under her feet and though he reached out to grab her, their partially phased bodies slipped through each other, and he could only watch as his mother fell into the center of Vulcan as it imploded upon itself leaving nothing but a black hole._

As Spock looked away from Nyota, he knew that he would never be the same, but he had to be strong for the people aboard this ship. After taking 10 minutes, he was back on the bridge, thinking about what they were to do next, "Out of the chair." He reminded that abhor able Kirk who Pike had promoted to first officer and was constantly getting on his last nerve.

It took everything that Uhura had to stop herself from getting up from the communication station and wrapping her arms around him and try to take his pain away. But he requested that she do her job to the best of her ability. So that was what she was doing, listening for any incoming transmissions like a good little girl. But she turned as the calm discussion between Kirk and Spock exploded. Spock wanted to follow orders and regroup with the rest of Starfleet, while Kirk insisted that they had to be 'unpredictable' and go after the ship before it had a chance to destroy earth the way it had destroyed Vulcan. And then she couldn't believe it, Spock had ordered Kirk off the bridge, and when he resisted, Spock had somehow pinched Kirk on the shoulder and now Kirk was uncontious. She watched as the security dragged Kirk to an escape pod where they'd 'get Kirk off the ship.'

Once Kirk had been taken cared off, she watched as Spock left the bridge for the first time in nearly ten hours, and she had to follow. "Why did you do that?" She asked entering his quarters.

"Do what?"

"Send Kirk down to that Glacier of a planet!"

"I was under the impression that you did not like Kirk."

"I don't, but you could have thrown him in the brig, not exiled him!"

"Now you are questioning my orders?"

Uhura's face softened, "I'm only trying to figure out how to help you. After what you've been through… I can't even begin to comprehend it or figure out what to do to make it better. Nothing I do will be enough, but I am here." She walked up to him slowly and was pleased that he allowed her to bring him into a hug.

"I want to scream and shout and, and kill somebody, and cry. But I must keep control of my emotions."

"Why?" She asked, "I know that you are half Vulcan and you pride yourself on controlling your emotions, but don't be afraid to show them to me. I love you."

"What?"

"I said, I love you, you hear me? If you need someone to lean on, cry on, I am here. You don't have to control your emotions around me." All the while she began stroking his face, neck, shoulders, and back much like you would to comfort a child.

His eyes softened as if to her touch, "I love you for that, but right now if I let my emotions slip, I feel like I'll never get my control of them back. Perhaps when this is all over, but now I have to focus on the mission."

Uhura kissed him. Not the soft kisses they had shared before in the turbo lift, but hard kisses. Kisses to forget the pain and the loss of the day, of the billions dead. "We must return to the bridge." Spock whispered through their touching lips.

"The ship needs a competent captain," Uhura reminded him, "Let me heal a part of your heart."

_He was back on Vulcan. The world was collapsing around him, and he looked and in front of him was not his mother, but Nyota. She was standing there with complete trust in him, her eyes as he let her fall into the crevices of the black hole that was Vulcan. _

"Nyota!" He screamed as he woke up.

"I'm right here." She whispered. They had finally slept for a few hours, only to be disrupted by Spock's obvious nightmare, "What was it? A nightmare?"

"It was what happened on Vulcan, only it wasn't my mother to fall into the planet's core, it was you." He said with more emotion than she'd ever heard before, he turned his head to her, with so much pain that it was eating away at her.

"I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere, I promise."

"I think the reason that I insisted that we not follow Nero, but regroup with Starfleet, was because I didn't want to lose anything else. After Vulcan and my mother, if I lost you, I would not survive."

Uhura looked at him straight in the eyes, "Spock, I promise you right here, that I will be at your side from this moment on. I cannot promise that we will always be together, but I do promise you that I will do my best to make sure that it is many years away."

Spock leaned his forehead to make contact with hers. "I thank you, my heart." He looked at the clock, "I must return to the bridge and prepare for whatever comes next."

"I'll come with you."

"All right. We shall prevail." Lt. Nyota Uhura knew just then that they'd be all right. The logical Vulcan just made a decision, even if it was unconscious to screw the odds… and that's when miracles happen.

_Thirty minutes_, that's how long it had been since they'd been back on the bridge, and there was another incident… Kirk and this waterlogged scot who claimed to be Starfleet were able to beam in during mid-warp. How, Uhura didn't know. She was just glad that he was all right. She had heard Dr. McCoy's argument with Spock earlier, _If you want to win the Kentucky Derby, you don't leave your prize stallion in the stables_. She didn't know about the 'prized stallion' and she knew that Kirk annoyed the hell out of her, but she didn't want him to die. But here he was mere minutes on the ship and they were arguing.

"…You never loved her." She heard Kirk say that and could see that something snapped within Spock. She watched as the man she loved disappeared and a raging vengeful man took his place. Sarek was standing next to her, and they watched as Spock and Kirk fought, until Kirk was on the flight consol with Spock's hand around his neck.

"Spock!" Sarek said in his 'father' voice. She had tears in her eyes as she watched her love realize what he'd almost done.

"I am emotionally compromised." He said as he resigned his commission. And left.

"Great, Jim, now we've got no captain and no first officer to replace him." McCoy said.

"Yes we do." Kirk said. And he sat in the chair in a very ominous way.

Sulu filled in the gaps, "Pike promoted Kirk to first officer."

She had to get to Spock, "I hope you know what you're doing." She said on her way out.

"Me too." He said, and she knew at that moment that he'd be a great leader, for she saw his arrogance leave his eyes for a split second.

Uhura stepped into the Lift, to be surprised to find Sarek joining her, "Excuse me."

Sarek stared at her. "You are in love with my son." He said calmly.

"Yes." No point in hiding it now.

"I have been aware of it for some time now. Amanda told me."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"You wished to keep it a secret, so I did as you both wished. You are going to find my son."

"I don't know what to say to him. He's lost more than I can comprehend… so have you." She said looking at the Vulcan that was her lover's father.

"I will speak with him, and perhaps after he shall be more accepting to your help."

"Thank you." She said. That is why she stood in the distance and watched as Spock stood on the Transporter platform that his mother was supposed to appear but never would, "Father, I cannot say what I need to say." She watched Spock near tears.

"Saying what you need to is never illogical."

"I cannot control the rage inside of me."

"Then don't. We have lost someone most important to both of us this day. I once told you that I married your mother because it was the logical thing to do. I married her because I loved her."

Uhura watched as Spock see his father in a new light for the first time. And she knew that he loved her, had for a long time but feared was incapable of that feeling. When Sarek and Spock exited the transporter room, she would be there.

TBC…

A/N: We've reached the part of the movie that inspired the title to my story! Yay! And I'm not done yet. Now, I want your opinion… should I get Uhura pregnant? Vote yes or no in your review!


	6. Beginning to Heal

A/N: Welcome back, thanks for all the great reviews! Here's the results of the poll: Should Uhura get pregnant: Yes – 22 votes - No – 6 votes. Now don't worry, it won't happen prematurely. This is the last, or one of the last chapters that will be during the movie… and I plan to keep going, either with this story or a sequel. Enjoy!

**Because I Loved Her**

**Chapter 6: Beginning to Heal**

"_Ny… Lt. …" Spock saw her when he exited the transporter room after speaking with his father. "What are you…"_

"_It is all right, my son." Sarek said, with a hand on his shoulder, "Your mother informed me of your relationship and your need to be secretive about it. I will leave you two alone."_

_Spock looked after his father. His father, whose logical action should have been to insist that he needed to focus on the problem at hand, had let him be alone with his human girlfriend. "I apologize for my emotional burst earlier."_

_Nyota looked down, sighed, and looked him straight in the eyes, putting her arms around his neck in a very human gesture that surprisingly gave him a great deal of comfort and peace at a time when his emotions was at the surface and threatening to explode, "I don't know what to do." His voice shook as he admitted it to her._

"_I love you," Nyota whispered, "And I think that right now you need to get back to the bridge."_

"_I resigned my commission."_

"_You know that our new acting captain will come up with some crazy plan to stop Nero. You must help him."_

"_But…"_

"_No, you can do it." Nyota assured him, "And I want you to remember what your father told you, and I want you to keep that in mind." She inhaled deeply, "You are half human, and while it might seem that your human emotions make you illogical, but the strong love that you feel for your parents and for me, that can be a immeasurably powerful force that gives us the strength to do the impossible. Embrace your emotions, and you may be surprised by what you can accomplish."_

After careful planning and input from everyone, Nyota Uhura walked her lover to the transport room, along with their new acting-captain. Today she saw a change in him, and could see a friendship and comradery forming between them, she only hoped that the two together have the ability to stop Nero, save Earth, and return safely.

Since his mother died, Spock had found that his emotions were more than a burden, they were also an asset. While he continued to mask his emotions by not showing many facial impressions he found that he no longer suppressed them as he once did. Reaching the transporter pad Spock soaked in Nyota's features, "Do you wish to be more public with our relationship when I return?" Spock asked, " And I _will_ return." He insisted.

"Yes, yes." And with that Uhura stood on her toes and initiated a deep kiss that was intended to announce their relationship to the world as well as show Spock how she felt. She was proud of her relationship with Spock, he was the best man she knew, and it wasn't fair to them to have to sneak around. Giggling, Nyota added, "Now that we've kissed in front of Scotty the entire ship will know before the day is out…"

Just then Kirk climbed onto the transporter, "I will return, Nyota," Spock repeated with more genuine emotion in his eyes than she'd ever seen.

"I'll be monitoring your transmissions." With great reluctance, Nyota unwrapped her arms from Spocks' and backed out of the chamber.

"so her name's Nyo…"

"I have nothing to say on the matter…" Spock interrupted the question. Nyota smiled at the two men who were capable of joking before such a serious mission. Despite this, Nyota had tears in her eyes as these two great men were beamed onto the Romulan ship, _He has to return,_' she thought to herself, _there's so much we have ahead of us_, and with Sock's strength in her heart she turned and made her way to the bridge, where she would do everything in her power to bring their two heroes home.

After the most horrible hours of her life, they were safe, Earth was safe and Nero was destroyed. However that didn't bring back the billions of Vulcans and hundreds of Starfleet personell that were lost because of Nero the rogue Romulan.

Once they were a safe distance from the black hole, Kirk ordered a full stop to assess damages and allow the crew, most of who had been at their posts of 24 hours. "Captain," Spock said, "It appears as if you've experienced some physical trauma. Perhaps you should let Dr. McCoy assess your injuries?"

"I'm fine."

Spock lifted one eyebrow. Nyota Stepped in, "why don't the three of us go and see how Captain Pike is doing? Spock, I believe your father decided to stay in Sickbay with the other Vulcans." She could see in Kirk's eyes, _Captain, she corrected herself_, that he knew what she was doing, but walked with them down to sickbay.

It turned out that when Scotty saved them from the black hole, the warp coil was damaged. It would take a month to repair, and only two weeks to get to earth on their impulse engines. So after Nyota contacted Starfleet, they were given orders.

So, Kirk announced to the crew, "This is acting Captain Kirk. I have spoken with Starfleet headquarters. Because of the damage to our warp drive, we must use our Impulse drive to get to the Jupiter Station for repairs. It will take weeks to get there, so all personnel will be split equally into three eight hour shifts. The heads of each department will schedule this for their people. I want all staff to find a chance to rest after all that we've been through in the last few days. I encourage you all to take advantage of the rec room and other recreational activities. All senior staff need to be kept available to help those below them. Thank you, the first eight hour shift will begin in four hours, at 0700 hours, deemed shift one, the second at 1500 hours, and the third at 2300 hours. Each head meet with me in two hours with your shift schedule. That's all.

He turned to the bridge in front of him, "Spock, I'll take the first shift, do you want second or third?"

"I will be second, who will take the third?"

"Lt. Commander Samson, head of security. I'm sure he won't mind the grave yard shift."

"I will inform him."

"Spock, why don't you and Lt. Uhura punch out after talking to Samson… I know that it's been at least 36 hours since either of you have slept. I need my first office and Communications officer in their best condition." Within the hour, Spock and Uhura made their way to Spock's quarters where she planned to ease his pain anyway she could.

They no longer needed words. Nyota closed the door to his quarters and sat on the bed, "What do you need?" She asked, a repeat of before in the Turbo Lift.

"I am unsure, I wish to forget, but at the same time I must ensure that she is remembered."

"Did your mother have any family on earth? They should be told."

"Mother had a brother, he and his wife live in Northern California, where they own a wine vineyard. My mother did not speak of him much. He did not approve of her choice in my father."

"We could go see them, if you'd like?"

"He will blame me for her death," Spock said sitting on the bed. "I could not save her, and had she chosen otherwise she would have been safe on earth."

"We can no longer think in 'what ifs'. What is, is. If our lives had been different we may not have fallen in love with each other."

"I also fear that the Vulcans will not like our pairing."

"Yes, I can see that."

"Indeed, with so few Vulcans, I will be expected to help rebuild the Vulcan society."

"And that means being with a Vulcan woman." Nyota said solemnly.

"The Vulcan society will think that I am further diluting Vulcan blood with that of humans."

"If you feel like that is what you feel you must do… I will never forget you, but I will understand."

Spock looked her straight in the eyes, "I lost my planet and my mother. If I were to lose you as well, I fear that I would not survive."

Nyota curled up next to Spock on the bed and cradled his head in her arms, "You will never lose me, I promise."

TBC…

A/N: Next chapter will be the last chapter that takes place during the movie… and then it will continue after the movie! I love all of the reviews that I've been getting! Please review!!!


	7. Returning Home

**Because I Loved Her**

**Chapter 7: Returning Home**

The journey home took weeks instead of hours because of the damaged warp engine, but it was a quiet trip. Dr McCoy was able to successfully remove the parasite from Captain Pike's spine, but the injury would require some time to heal, so Kirk remained as Acting Captain until their return to earth.

After two weeks the U.S.S. Enterprise arrived at Jupiter stations where shuttle pods were waiting to take people back to earth. The engineers said the repairs would take at least a month, so all crew members were looking forward to some leave before heading off on their next mission.

Spock had heard that his father wanted to see him in the docking bay, but on the way he met… himself. Spock Prime, what people have been calling the older version, was an intriguing individual who was created through a hundred and fifty years of experiences that would be completely different than his own thanks to the time rift. Spock had been conflicted for the last weeks about what to do. He wanted to stay in Starfleet and stay with Uhura, but there were only 10,543 Vulcans left in the known universe and he was needed to rebuild their civilization.

"Stay in Starfleet," Spock prime had urged of him, among other things. Now that he knew that he was, in a way, there for his people, he made the decision right there that the best thing he could do for the remaining Vulcans was to remain in Starfleet and use his skills to maintain peace in the galaxy.

So, when Spock finally found his father, he had made up his mind, "How are you doing, my son?" Sarek asked.

"As can be expected. Lt. Uhura has been helping me attain the sleep that I require."

"I am glad that you have found her." Sarek said, "You're mother approved."

"That is pleasing to hear."

"I must warn you, Son, that the other Elders have been discussing the future of our civilization, and do not like one of our own mating with a human. If you wish to marry her, you will not be able to get a Vulcan to perform the ceremony."

Spock sighed, "I understand their logic, Father, but I must stay in Starfleet and I must stay with Lt. Uhura. After all we have lost… she saved me. I love her, and I am going to marry her someday, when she is ready. I hope that when the time comes you will be there."

"We shall see." Sarek said.

Spock watched as the now Admiral Pike transferred his command to now Captain James T. Kirk of the Starship Enterprise. Surprisingly he felt a sense of pride in the transfer. In a crisis the new captain was well qualified with a cool head and ideas that when at first seem illogical, but were in fact effective. At the same time, over the last weeks Kirk also seemed to have a calm head with the administrative duties associated with command, making schedules, and the like. He knew that he wanted to be aboard the Enterprise when it left for its next mission at the end of next month, for multiple reasons. With his skills and background he would be invaluable to the crew, and he wanted to be close to Nyota. The last was an illogical reason, but he found that sometimes the most illogical choices in life were the most fulfilling.

An hour after the ceremony ended, Spock, and Uhura were walking out. Uhura mentioned that they had been invited to go out with Kirk, Scotty, Bones, Sulu and Chekov. Spock had found that among humans this type of comradery could be very effective in relieving tension when times were tough. However as they were leaving the auditorium, three senior members of the Vulcan science academy were waiting for him.

"Spock, may we have a word?" the man in the middle asked, "Alone?"

"I do not keep secrets from the Lieutenant; you may speak in her presence."

"Very well," He said, "We are leaving as soon as possible for the new Vulcan colony, and we would like you to join us. We would like every Vulcan to find a Vulcan mate and do their part in continuing our society."

Nyota looked up at him. He knew that if agreed to go with them without her, she would not object. And he loved her for it, "I am afraid that I must decline. My place is on the Enterprise. Now, if you'll excuse us, we have a previous engagement."

Nyota's mouth hung open as they left, "Why did you do that?"

"Spock Prime, the older version of myself, told me that I should stay in Starfleet, and that he did not want to deny me the friendships that he had in his youth. I feel that being in Starfleet, keeping the galaxy safe and peaceful, will serve my people just as well as anything I could do on the new colony."

Meanwhile, Kirk walked out of the auditorium behind Spock and Uhura, and heard that Spock was staying in Starfleet. He smiled. If he was going to be the youngest Captain in Starfleet history, he'd need a good first officer, and he thought that Spock would fit the bill perfectly. "Spock, Uhura, you coming? We're going out to celebrate."

"We shall be joining you shortly, where are you congregating?"

"The Constellation down the street, at the corner."

"We shall be there."

Kirk broke out in a big smile, "Great," He said, "See you there!"

Kirk was surprised when Captain Pike joined them in the bar. He was not allowed to drink because it would interfere with his rehab, but here he was, in a bar. "Admiral, what are you doing here?"

"I wanted to talk to you about the future of the enterprise."

"I would have come to your office, Sir."

"I know, but I heard about your impromptu celebration and didn't want to be left out."

"Off course sir, you are always welcome." Kirk said, "What's the news?"

"We are sending the Enterprise on a long term mission, it will be at least two years before you return to earth. We found on long range sensors a group of planets that are farther away than any federation ship has ever gone before, there is evidence of sentient life forms. And while you're out there your orders are to keep an eye out on anything of scientific interest."

"When do we leave?"

"Two months. I'll send over the specifics next week. Do you know who you want as your senior staff?"

"Off the top of my head, I would like Scotty for my Chief Engineer, Dr. McCoy as Chief Medical, Lt. Uhura, my communications officer on the bridge, Sulu at the helm, Chekov Navigator. But I have a question, if we're going to be gone for so long… could we allow the crew to bring their spouses and children with them?"

"Jim, I know that you were left at home with your step father as a child when your mother was off on missions… is that where this is coming from?"

"Partially, I don't want my crew to have to choose between the mission of a lifetime and years of their children's lives."

"I will suggest it to the other Starfleet admirals. If they agree, you will have to get a count of how many children and their ages so that we can set up the appropriate child care. Actually, this kind of mission would be the perfect experiment, but no promises."

"Fine, oh, and you probably have heard of the relationship between Commander Spock and Lt. Uhura. It won't affect their positions on the Enterprise, will it?"

"I haven't seen any evidence that the relationship has affected their work, and Starfleet does not have any regulations that permits to Starfleet Officers from having a personal relationship." Pike smiled, "This is a good sign."

"What is?"

"You're already advocating for your crew, that is the sign of a great captain."

"I appreciate the vote of confidence. We will be ready on time." Just then Kirk heard the laughter of Scotty, Chekov, and Sulu. He turned around, five people had walked in including Spock and Uhura. "Hey, there's my senior staff!"

TBC…

A/N: One more chapter for this story, the next one will be surrounding their extended mission. We'll get into Spock and Uhura's decisions surrounding marriage and children! Questions to anyone who knows more about the original series: Were families aboard? I know that they were in Star Trek: The Next Generation… but am unsure with the Original Series. Please review!


	8. Family

**Because I Loved Her**

**Chapter 8: Family  
**

As a part of the acting senior staff aboard the Enterprise, after arriving at Jupiter Station, Commander Spock and Lt. Uhura were among the last to be taken to earth. When they exited the transport Spock and Nyota were standing shoulder to shoulder, ready to hold hands when no one was looking, when Nyota Uhura was rushed by her mother and father who engulfed her in gripping hugs of worried parents. Spock admired his lover as the woman he assumed was Nyota's mother, checked her daughter for any injuries and relieved to find none. "Thank you, thank you, my baby is all right!"

"Mother!" Uhura hissed, "Not here!"

Spock knew that Nyota was embarrassed, but he thought that it was a lovely scene. After losing his own mother, he had begun looking back and thanking all his memories of her. After leaving for Starfleet, he had written his mother weekly and called her as often as was possible. However he had not spoken to his father since he'd turned down the Vulcan science Academy.

Next to Uhura's mother, a large black man with his daughter's eyes and an inner strength that he'd come to admire in humans. "You must be Commander Spock." He was shocked to hear his name.

"Yes I am."

"Our daughter's letter spoke highly of you. I am glad that she had a teacher who took such an interest in her."

"It was only logical, Lt. Uhura's gifts called for special attention."

Mr. Uhura's eyes softened, "We heard about Vulcan, I am so sorry. I cannot begin to understand what you've been through."

"I thank you for the thought though."

Uhura had escaped from her mother and wrapped an arm around Spock's waist. "Mother, father, I would like you to meet Commander Spock. We've become very close over the last year."

Her mother looked at the two of them, "Why didn't you…"

"We wanted to keep it quiet until I got my commission, but with everything that's happened." She stood up to her parents, "I am happy, Commander Spock makes me happy."

Mrs. Uhura's eyes teared up at that, "Of course, as long as you're happy, we are happy for you, aren't we, Nigil?"

While Spock could see that Mr. Uhura did not approve of his daughter having a relationship with her instructor, but went along with his wife, "Of course, dear." But he leaned in and whispered to Spock, "You break her heart, I'll break your legs."

Uhura saw this and Spock's reaction, the raising of one eyebrow which she had come to learn was the subtle way that he expressed amusement, and caught herself before she giggled. The four of them were able to spend some time before Nyota and Spock were able to find some time together. When they were alone, Uhura posed a question to him, "You mentioned that you had a Uncle in northern California. Do you want me to go with you?" She asked.

His trained control of emotions always seemed to find their way out around Uhura. "Your presence would be greatly appreciated."

Spock had a month's leave before he had to be back if he were to continue with Starfleet, so they rented a car and drove to the Vineyards to the north east of San Francisco where Spock's uncle, William Grayson and his family lived. The yellow house was surrounded by green vines that were thriving in the early summer. He noted the little girl, no more than three, was playing in the front yard. She had dark curls that reminded him of images of his mother in her youth.

She saw them and called to the house, "Mama, it's a Vulcan!"

"Sammy? What do you mean a Vulcan?" The woman came out through the front door and saw the two of them beside the car, "Oh… Can I help you?"

"I am looking for William Grayson."

"Sure. Honey! We have visitors!" She called into the house. "Why don't you come in, I'm just setting the table for lunch."

Nyota entered the house with a very nervous Spock until a young man around thirty came into the entry way. "Can I help you?"

"I am sorry, you cannot be him. I am Spock, my mother's name is Amanda Grayson, she had a brother named William Grayson…"

"That must be my father. My parents retired and left the land in my keeping. They'll be back for harvest time but right now are living in San Diego. So, if your mother and my father are siblings… we're cousins."

"Were." Spock said. "My mother was on Vulcan when it was destroyed. She did not make it."

"Oh… I'm so sorry. So, you came to tell Dad about his sister."

"And to introduce myself. My father and I are the only family left from his side. It is only logical to reach out to all possible connections."

Nyota saw the man's lips twitch in a smile at the Vulcan speech patterns. "I am Lt. Nyota Uhura. We serve together in Starfleet aboard the Enterprise."

The little girl who had been witnessing this exchange asked, "Are you a Vulcan too?"

"No, I'm from Africa." As if the little girl's question was the cue, the group moved to the kitchen where lunch was set up. Nyota was surprised that there were five settings. Obviously Mrs. Grayson had snuck back there and added two places to the table. Throughout lunch Spock explained everything about his parents, his choice of Starfleet, the destruction of Vulcan and the death of his mother.

"You lost your mommy?" the little girl asked.

He looked down at the little girl, "I did."

"I'm sorry."

"Thank you," Spock said.

William smiled at the exchange, "She's taken a shining to you, cousin."

"Indeed."

"What do you do?" the girl asked.

"I am a Commander in Starfleet."

"Oh, but what do you do?"

"I am the science officer aboard Enterprise currently."

Mrs. Grayson, who had identified herself as Becky, turned to Nyota, "And you, Nyota, what is your specialty. I saw the Starfleet jacket in the car."

"I just got my commission as a Communications officer, I just became a Lieutenant and was assigned to the Enterprise as well."

She nodded. William's expression turned serious, "I'm sorry that our parents didn't keep in contact after your mother's marriage. Let's not repeat their mistake… after all, Samantha seems to have taken a shine to you, Uncle Spock."

Nyota couldn't help but smile. Spock had found a connection in his long lost human cousin and his family. He was not alone.

TBC…

A/N: Well, for all those who have come to follow this story, you're in luck, I will have one more chapter, an epilogue. After that I have a new story called 'Destiny's Hand.' This story will follow the Enterprise as it leaves earth for a long term mission. Enjoy! And please review!


	9. Epilogue

**Because I Loved Her**

**Epilogue**

Kirk sighed at his desk. _Paperwork!_ The one bad thing about being in command was all the paperwork. Kirk and his new senior staff, along with Starfleet administrative staff had all worked together and two months after the destruction of Nero and all but one of the newly build NCC class ships were destroyed, the Enterprise was ready to go again. The enterprise was capable of carrying 500 people. When they left at the end of next week they will have 350 crew members, 150 who are married to each other, and 200 not married. They will also have 100 children aboard who are dependents of their crew, and 35 spouses of crew members, along with 15 civilians who were brought on as teachers for grades 1-12, preschool, and other day care activities as well as a pediatrician. Captain James T. Kirk never imagined that his idea would create so much work, but it was all set up.

When they had originally come up with the idea, many of the members of Starfleet who were married to another Starfleet personnel who had children jumped at the chance to share their lives with their children. There were still many children who would be left on earth with mothers, fathers, and/ or grandparents, but Starfleet was interested in how the ship functions with families aboard. To do that they assigned Commander Krystal Kent to report back on their functioning.

Among the civilians to join the crew, was Pediatrician Dr. Carol Marcus. She had finished her second year of residency and due to their need, Dr. Leo "Bones" McCoy offered to sponsor her for the remaining of her residency. Dr. Carol Marcus was a very smart woman. She had finished high school at 15 and college at 18, and going on to Med school had graduated by 22. Now 24 years old, she was looking forward to this great adventure that life had presented to her.

Meanwhile on earth, the now Admiral Pike had called Commander Spock and Lt. Uhura to his office. "Well, you are on time, come in."

Spock nodded, "I believe that I am aware for the reason that you called us here."

"Yes, It has come to my attention that the two of you have pursued a relationship recently." He chuckled, "You kiss in the transporter room… word gets around and nurses are horrible gossips."

Uhura's face was straight and her face was unemotional like a Vulcan, "Sir, I wish to know, how will this affect our careers?"

"Well, Lieutenant, not that much now that you graduated from the Academy. However I am extremely disappointed in you, Commander Spock, pursuing a relationship with a Cadet!"

"Sir, you should probably know that it was my idea, and if Spock tried to give me something I didn't earn, I'd kick his butt myself."

"That's the only reason that you two still have your commissions. Now, what are your plans? Are both going to remain on the Enterprise?"

"Yes Admiral." Spock answered.

"Well, relationships between officers are not against Regs… therefore I am just going to say one more thing, when you two decide to tie the knot, make sure to send me an invitation. Alright?" With that Admiral Pike smiled, "Keep me informed in the future, alright?"

Spock and Uhura nodded, "Yes sir."

"And if you're going to spend most nights in the same bed anyway, you might as well file for double occupancy on the Enterprise." He said with humor in his voice, "Dismissed."

Uhura and Spock were both shocked as they left the Admiral's office. "Did you ever imagine?" Uhura asked.

"Never." Spock said, he glanced at Uhura with one eyebrow raised, "What do you think of the Admiral's suggestion for our living situation?"

"Would you feel comfortable? We're not married."

"We have spent every night together since we returned together. Your presence calms the strong emotions within me and I would indeed enjoy the prospect of being bonded with you when you are ready."

"Are you asking me to marry you?"

"I guess I am."

"But we're due to ship out next week!"

"I have read the earth customs regarding engagement, and is a long engagement normal? With our current mission, we shall not return to earth for six months. Perhaps we could get married on our return."

Uhura's face lit up, showing the joy that he felt as well but old habit required that he not show it. "It's a plan. Let's call my parents! My mother will love the challenge of planning a wedding! But wait, don't you want a Vulcan ceremony?"

"The Vulcans will not wish to sanction our union."

"Why?"

"Because instead of working with the remaining Vulcans to rebuild our civilization I am staying as an Officer in Starfleet, and I am choosing a path where my future children will only be one quarter Vulcan. With only 10,000 Vulcans left, my choice to dilute the blood line is Illogical and the only Vulcans who will support it is my father and the Spock from the future."

"I'm sorry." Uhura looked down, "They're right. We shouldn't be doing this. I love you, but there are billions of other human males for me to choose from, and I am taking a Vulcan male away from who knows how many unmated Vulcan females."

"Nyota," Spock said seriously, "We are not a species being hunted to extinction for our pelts. We are a sentient species capable of choosing our own destiny. In the future more Vulcans may choose to mate humans or other species. I choose you to be my wife, my wife. Is it not logical to make a choice that makes us both happy rather than a choice that would make us both miserable?"

"You're sure?"

"I have not been so sure since I joined Starfleet." Spock took her hand, "Now let us go call our family and go home, aboard the Enterprise."

The End

A/N: to all you out there having a heart attack at 'The End' don't panic! I have the prologue of the new story 'Destiny's Hand' already written and posted! I look forward to your input! Thank you for the many many reviewers, I enjoyed reading every one. Just a note: Dr. Carol Marcus is a potential love interest for Jim Kirk… in the original universe she was the mother of Kirk's Son, David and a geneticist who created the project 'Genesis' in Star Trek II: the Wrath of Khan.


End file.
